How to Handle Depression

• What is Depression
• Signs of Depression
• Causes of Depression
• How to Address Depression 
• Practical Tools 

What is Depression

• Depression is anger turned inward/toward oneself.
• It is a “normal” emotion.
• It’s an implosion vs an explosion.
• When it is severe, it can cause one to become immobilized.
• General/normative depression vs diagnosable Major Depressive Disorder.

Signs of Depression

• Sleeping too much or being unable to sleep much.
• Over-eating or loss of appetite/noticeable weight gain, or weight loss.
• Losing interest or pleasure in activities one used to enjoy.
• Feeling tired or fatigued on a consistent/long-term basis, without a physical cause.
• Feeling sadness, irritable, emptiness, or hopelessness.
• Feeling worthless or excessive guilt.
• Difficulty with concentration, being forgetful, and unable to make simple decisions.
• Desire to “sleep and not wake up.”
• Thoughts of death or suicide.
• Suicidal gestures or attempts.

Causes of Depression

1. Disappointments in life.
2. Unmet expectations.
3. Experience of trauma or abuse.
4. Experience of (systemic) injustice.
5. Alcohol or substance use.
6. Biochemical/neurotransmitter imbalance.
7. Genetic predisposition.
8. Physical illness induced depression.
9. Medication side effects.
10. Any combination of the above.

How to Address Depression

1 & 2: Disappointments and Unmet Expectations:

• Disappointments in life and unmet expectations go hand in hand.
• Examine our expectations toward life.
• Examine our expectations in the particular circumstance.
• Since we have no control over others, nor do we possess full power/control over our life circumstances, we can work on our expectations:
• Identify our expectations in each situation.
• Are these expectations realistic: Do we have full control over the situation/circumstance?
• Embrace our limitations.
• Adjust what we could realistically expect from the situation.
• Put our negative emotions into words: Bringing what’s in the unconscious to the conscious. 
• Our unconscious is the seat/control/origination of our resistances (Not doing what we want to/believe in doing).
• Our unconscious has no words; it’s full of feelings and conundrums.
• Our unconscious “controls” our behavior/life patterns: We find ourselves acting/reacting in a surprising way that sometimes can be confusing and/or frustrating to us.
• Our unconscious needs to be embraced, not forced to change. The more we force it to change, the more entrenched it becomes in remaining the same.
• Being gracious and “accepting” of our unconscious and resistances, the “safer” our unconscious feels. When it is ready, it will come up to the surface (and become conscious).
• Once we become aware of our unconscious – as it’s being made into our conscious by putting into words - we can now can have better control over it.

• Adopt a “Glass half full vs half empty” mentality.
• Grieve what we cannot change/have no control over.
• Allow ourselves to feel our negative emotions without marinating in them for too long.

3 & 4: Trauma, Abuse, Injustice:

• Acknowledge the trauma, abuse, and injustices we’ve experienced in life.
• Grieve these experiences. Stages of grief: 

1. Shock and Denial.
2. Anger.
3. Bargaining. 
4. Depression (There are two components to this depression: Missing what we used to have; and relief that we no longer have to deal with the negative sides of what was lost). 
5. Acceptance. 

• Address them: What can we do to mitigate these experiences?
• Choose to forgive our aggressor so we can take back the power and control that they’ve robbed us of. (See blog post on “Forgiveness” https://linrathe-tips-on-life-in-small-bites.blogspot.com/2025/03/forgiveness-outline-what-is-forgiveness.html)
• What can we take away from these experiences: How can we sublimate them (turn them into something good/acceptable) and have these experiences “work for”/benefit us and benefit others?

5. Alcohol or substance abuse:

• Alcohol is a depressant that slows down the central nervous system, potentially causing feelings of sadness and/or depression.
• Depending on the substance one uses, it can cause feelings of sadness or depression. 
• One can experience depressive withdrawal symptoms from the cessation of alcohol or substance abuse.
• Be on the lookout for one’s genetic predisposition toward alcohol or substance abuse: Are there family members with alcohol or substance issues? People with a predisposition toward these issues can become more prone to addiction.
• One can do well to minimize or stop its usage to avoid its depressive effects.

6. Biochemical/neurotransmitter imbalance: 

• Low levels of Serotonin or Norepinephrine, or Dopamine can cause symptoms of depression.
• One can address these issues through medication (antidepressants or SSRIs).

7. Genetic Predisposition: 

• Having family members with depression can cause one to be more prone to depression.
• Know that it’s no fault of ours to be genetically predisposed to depression.
• Address the symptoms with talk therapy and medication as needed.

8. Physical Illness-Induced Depression:

• It is normal for a person to feel some depression upon hearing a medical diagnosis, especially when it’s a serious, or chronic, or cancerous, or terminal illness.
• Our brainstem carries physical pain from the body into the brain. It is situated next to the site in our brain that processes emotions, and they are situated next to the site of our brain that processes thoughts. 
• This trifecta is in constant interaction with one another.
• Any of these three can negatively or compound the other two: Physical pain; irrational/pessimistic thoughts; further negative emotions/depression.
• When we feel physical pain, it can affect our thoughts and views about the pain, and cause us to feel negative emotions, which can then increase our physical pain. 
• Therefore, when we have physical pain, it is good to address it medically. Take pain meds when we have physical pain, to prevent the pain from causing us to think pessimistically about the situation, and causing us to feel down or depressed. 

9. Medication Side Effects:

• Most medication has some side effects.
• Some of the side effects can include depression.
• When we feel depressed, one of the things we can try to eliminate is to read the label for all the medications we are taking, to see if any of them might be causing our depression.
• If depression is one of the side effects of a medication we’ve been prescribed, it behooves us to ask the doctor to see if there’s an alternate medication they can prescribe that will not cause this side effect.
• Sometimes, we might have to take an antidepressant to combat the side effect of depression from a crucial medication we need to take.

10. Any Combination of the Above:

• Be on the lookout that depression can be caused by a combination of things.
• Address each factor above.

Practical Tools

• If we are in Christ, we will live eternally.
• Emotionally, all we have is this present moment.
• Every moment starts and eventually ends.
• Looking to the past is “Pressing the rewind button,” and causes us to regret or long for something that is no longer.
• To predict the future is “Writing the script” of what’s to happen. Since we are not God, we do not have control over what will take place in the future. When we continue to predict the future, it can cause a self-fulfilling prophecy, where we unconsciously cause our worst fears to become reality.
• It behooves us to embrace each moment…and let it go when it ends.
• Trust in God’s sovereignty, that He is in control of our lives.
• God loves us and attends to us constantly and continually.
• God has His best for us, even when we go through the valley of the shadow of death and depression.
• God promises to be with us in every situation, every moment.
• Get in touch with the anger that’s underneath the depression.
• Invite God’s presence to go with us when we feel depressed.
• Tell God how we feel: Our anger, disappointments, etc.
• God knows our every thought before we think them, so He can take our anger and is not surprised or disappointed by them.
• God is a loving Heavenly Father Who wants His children to go to Him with their negative emotions toward Him.
• God embraces us as we yell at Him and are angry toward Him.
• Keep turning toward God as we express our anger and disappointments toward Him.
• God’s love for us does not change when we are mad at Him.
• Share our emotions with a close and trustworthy friend or family member.
• Consider talk therapy to process our depressive thoughts and to have a professional come alongside us in our depression. 
• Consider medication when appropriate.